Good morning, everyone!

Six in the morning

is upon us once more.

This time, though, it's Friday,

the last workday of the week!

You have to give your best today, so...

Wake up! ​Wake up! Wake up! Wake up!

Wake up! ​Wake up! Wake up! Wake up!

Wake up! Wake up! ​Wake up! Wake up!

Wake up! Wake up! ​Wake up! Wake up!

Wake up! Wake up! Wake up! ​Wake up!

Wake up! Wake up! Wake up! ​Wake up!

Wake up! Wake up! Wake up! Wake up!

Wake up, okay?

If you're bad at getting up early,

if you get habituated to

watching Morning Coco Live,

you may manage to always wake up.

That said,

we have lots of news

to inform you about, so let's have a look, shall we?

Aah...

As you can see,

there's been a crowd rattling

above my head, every morning,

for the entire week. This crowd is none other

than today's viewer-commentators!

Good morning!

Ehehe.

Good morning!

Everyone's energetically

saying "good morning" and "rattle rattle".

We seem to have lots of things to inform you about,

but we have to start it off with this.

A pathetic report!

Oh my!

Some days ago, this stream

called "Shadow Game" was realized,

and it was perplexing, a totally random stream.

It was broadcast

from Aqua-paisen's channel,

and, oh my...!

Just to begin with,

from the very start of this stream,

Ms. Marine's choppy resolution

Marine-paisen's resolution

was very choppy, and everyone could tell.

Just compare them; she's as choppy as it gets.

You'd think she'd just been through the chopping board.

And, to top it off,

this stream's gimmick

had a special rule: They'd play games

and for each loss, their bodies would

gradually start fading away.

And you won't believe it...

Disappearing and exploding in mere 30 minutes

Both have pretty much disappeared 30 min in.

Barely 30 minutes in,

they're too transparent to be seen

and the punchline was an explosion.

This is...

Hmm...

This is pretty pathetic, don't you think?

Let's see what you guys think:

"wew"

"lol"

"explosions for a punchline? simply the worst"

Uh...

"what a mess lol"

Hm...

Many people are saying

explosions for a punchline

is simply the worst, now this is...

We'll have to agree. This was pathetic.

No doubt about it, if you ask me.

Well...

Speaking of pathetic...

there was even more of it

yesterday, wasn't there?

Oh my!

7/2 Stream on Ookami Mio's channel

Some days ago, we did―

We did it yesterday, actually.

The Onomatopoeia King Competition.

I see that

Ms. Kiryu C.Co participated,

but this was a stream that took place on Mio-paisen's channel.

And you won't believe it!

Some of you seem to know already,

Unbelievable: Oversleeps and doesn't make it in time for stream

but much to everyone's surprise,

unlikely as it may sound,

Someone was late for this stream...

Ms. Sakura Miko!

Unbelievable, she overslept

and didn't make it in time...

This is...

Well...

Pathetic, isn't it?

This is no doubt― I see someone trembling.

This is,

uuh...

I guess even an elite can be pathetic sometimes.

However,

truth is, a little while

before the stream started― The stream was scheduled for 7 PM.

The stream would start at 7 PM,

Tweets at 18:33 (Stream starts at 7 PM)

and, as you see here,

at 6:33 PM,

Miko-paisen posted "Nyahello!

This is today's schedule!"

on Twitter, did anyone see it?

The tweet was

posted on 6:33 PM,

so this should mean

that she's preparing for the 7 PM stream.

She oughta be, right?

Or so you'd think, but...

This got posted

at 6:33 PM, but the exact hour

the members gathered

to prepare for this stream

was 6:40 PM.

So when the members gathered at 6:40 PM,

they were like, "Miko-paisen tweeted 7 minutes ago, so there's no problem."

"She'll soon be here, right?"

"Any time now."

"..."

"Where is she?"

"Why isn't she coming?!"

"Where did she go?!" and so on.

Everyone started to get nervous by then.

Ms. Shirakami Fubuki's Soulful Call

@SakuraMiko MIKOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Even she,

Fubuki-paisen let out a soulful

call for her, to no avail.

This call happened at 6:53 PM,

13 minutes after everyone had assembled.

That's when it sank in.

Everyone panicked, "Did she forget?"

"No way she'd forget, right?"

"But..."

"Did she fall asleep?"

"Is she sleeping?"

That's what everyone was thinking then.

But, even so,

considering how she

had tweeted three minu― seven minutes earlier,

it's unlikely she'd tweet and sleep after.

I'm sure you're considering that.

Here's a secret for you guys:

Remember this stream?

6/25 Stream on Murasaki Shion's channel

Some time ago,

I did this stream.

On June 25th,

on Murasaki Shion's channel,

we aired this Kanji Battle stream.

The thing is...

When we did this,

the members were

me, Shion-paisen, and A-chan, this trio.

But, actually,

when we first assembled to prepare,

only Ms. A-chan and I were there.

So, we also

*oh shion*

considered that Shion-paisen

was possibly still asleep.

Just a vague suspicion.

But, just like in the other case, Shion-paisen had,

just a few

minutes ago, roughly 10 minutes ago,

she tweeted.

So we figured it was fine.

"She tweeted 10 minutes ago, it's fine."

As such,

Ms. A-chan and I waited for her.

Shion tweeted minutes ago, but didn't show up for assembly time

Alright!! What will we do if Shion-paisen doesn't show up?

Ultimately,

she didn't appear when we agreed to assemble

and airing time drew ever closer.

Both Ms. A-chan and I were quite

troubled by that.

"Oh no... Oh no..."

"wuh?"

"How can

Shion-senpai

be asleep if she's made a tweet? Is she really sleeping?"

And so on.

But, in the end,

when it was about airing time,

Shion appeared,

even though

she didn't make it for assembling time.

When she finally showed up,

"Phew, that was close I was asleep."

she said, "phew, that was close.

I was asleep." She was asleep.

We asked how was she asleep,

considering she had tweeted 10 minutes earlier.

And her reply was,

"That was a scheduled post"

"That was a scheduled tweet."

This was when

I learned how fearsome

scheduled posts can be.

Oh well.

This is... kind of...

When a tweet is scheduled,

it doesn't matter how long ago it was posted,

it becomes irrelevant.

In regards to this,

this is what Expert C had to say:

The schedule post function has made stalking celebrities in real-time obsolete

"The schedule fun― The schedule post

function has made

stalking celebrities in real-time obsolete."

You can't stalk

celebrities in real-time anymore.

Don't you see it often?

Checking out if, during Christmas,

a voice actress isn't, y'know...

Doing... y'know?

Going to her BF's house behind our backs.

The otaku do it every year.

They do, don't they?

By using this function,

it completely

throws stalkers off the trail.

Since, y'know,

they can post it ahead of time,

saying they're at home

eating dinner, posting a selfie even.

But they can just post that

way ahead of time now.

Oh weeeeell...

Well.

But then there's Ms. Kiryu Coco.

A very serious, proper,

and sincere pro idol like Ms. Kiryu Coco

would never do that.

She never lies or fakes anything,

I'll even tell you that

she's already scheduled a post

The ideal sincere pro idol

SEGA and I had a fantastic night together

to go up on this year's Christmas.

She doesn't lie.

This is a prediction.

She'll be with her BF, ＳＥ→ＧＡ↑,

having a fantastic night.

You can trust Coco, guys.

As you can see―

Well, to be honest,

from where I comed from―

came...

Uh... Uh...

Back in the US of Dragon America,

Christmas is

not a day you spend with your boyfriend.

This is a Japan-exclusive thing, did you know?

Erm...

Christmas means family,

a day to spend with your family.

As for me, my family comes over from Friday to Sunday,

and you can hear them on my streams even,

so I'd personally like some distance from my family.

By the way,

my dragon relatives will be around,

and, for whatever reason, some friends

of my dragon relatives will also be

staying over, what a nightmare.

Tonight will be rumbly, I feel.

Oh well.

With that said, going back to the topic,

Miko-paisen's tweet is what matters.

What was the issue there, you ask?

Confesses it was a scheduled tweet

You guessed it, Miko-paisen had,

as she confessed

during the aforementioned stream,

used the schedule function.

If she scheduled it―

Then

forgot she scheduled

and went to sleep.

Then, during this, erm,

onomatopoeia stream, she

Filling in for the wait time while points are tallied

had to, as punishment,

fill in the wait time while points where tallied.

Erm,

I think you guys saw Miko-paisen

having to deal with odd topics,

but here's the behind the scenes:

The one who

thought up the second round

of onomatopoeia she did

Kiryu Coco suggested Misogi, the Shinto purification ritual

was―

That was my suggestion, which I secretly sent.

I sneaked away a little to whisper that one.

Erm,

the second act by Miko-paisen,

that second thing, it was my idea.

I secretly sent it to Mio-paisen.

I used...

I sent it via Discord.

Hahaheehee.

"it was you?!"

Yup.

After that, Mio-senpai nimbly

switched the actual theme with that.

But, then again,

she didn't tell me she'd use it.

Since I was being sneaky,

and there was no reply to it,

I, y'know,

didn't know if my

secret suggestion

would be used or not,

then, later,

when Miko-paisen was going "bowaaa"

"bobobowa" and so on,

I wrote something else entirely.

I suggested it,

erm,

it was my idea, but I answered it wrong.

Since I didn't know if it'd be used.

Miko-paisen's second theme,

I said it was a party-goer.

"everyone got it wrong"

Heeheeheehe.

I had no idea!

Gaddem.

'Twas too difficult.

With that said, guys,

uuh, uh...

Let's see the next one.

"you really didn't know"

I really didn't.

That was 4D chess.

She secretly decided to use it,

so even if I was secretly in on it, I didn't know.

That said, next report!

Oh my!

It's an ARK report, guys!

Ms. Shirakami Fubuki enters the Crystal Isles!

Yay!

Why,

it's Ms. Shirakami Fubuki! She's finally

descending upon

the crystal world!

We'll finally see Fubuki-paisen

play Crystal and

come back to ARK,

it's been quite a while, hasn't it?

Uhh, right?

Yesterday I was

waiting if she'd come.

Uhh... Oh?

Meanwhile, elsewhere...

ARK stream aired July 2 @ Coco Ch.

Ms. Kiryu Coco

seems to have

set her foot upon

a whole new

and unknown

world of ARK― This doesn't look like

Crystal Isles though...!

Time for an ad.

*hype*

Here we have―!

Waaah!

It's finally here!

Along with the blissfully peaceful

world of Crystal Isles,

comes―!

―comes two more

different and dangerous worlds!

We've kept you guys waiting!

Two new official maps added to ARK server "Cross ARK" feature enabled!

We added two more official maps to our server!

I worked hard to add

that Cross ARK setting!

You see,

the teleportation modules―

I've enabled all the teleportation modules in ARK

to allow you travel to other maps

in the blink of an eye! And there's more!

Not only did I add the Extinction map, but

I also added the least popular map

in the whole of ARK― Scorched Earth!

Yes, I threw it in!

Well, yeah.

Let me explain things for those who're unaware.

See here, um,

the Scorched Earth map

is the least popular map in ARK― a desert.

It's a desert.

"scorched earth?!"

Oh, eve―

Even Suckonbu-sensei said "scorched earth".

This is a burning land,

this place is

absurd in how

sweltering of a world it is.

This world has

a very unique creature.

There's only one of its kind.

Only one of it spawns in the entire map.

An unbelievable creature―

the Phoenix.

The mythical Phoenix― I actually have

ever only seen it once.

The Phoenix, that is.

The Phoenix is

a mythical―

a mythical dinosaur, and there's only one.

The Phoenix is a burning dino, after all.

A burning dino.

What's more,

if you harvest some raw meat and put it in its inventory,

it instantly becomes cooked.

It's an automatic grill!

Which one of us will find

and capture it first?

And then there's

the other map that I added, Extinction!

This is ARK Extinction.

This is the proper sequel to

the old Aberration map

that we had in the hololive server.

Only the kind of addict

that cleared even Aberration

can really thrive in it, it's really just that difficult.

It does have safe regions,

but the difficulty gap

between the safe and unsafe regions

is very intense,

that's how this map is.

Though, well, Scorched Earth is sorta the same.

Like,

you're guaranteed to be burned at least once.

Anyway,

guys, this map will be

unlocked for the server

and for all the hololive members as well,

so please look forward to

me and your faves traveling through the worlds!

Onto our next report!

Oh, the ARK dudes are also excited!

"as expecocoted"

The ARK dudes sure are having a blast.

Unfortunately, here comes another

pathetic report for you all.

What do we have here?

"You Made Pasta"

The other day,

on the Kiryu Coco channel,

a member-exclusive

wallpaper was posted

on the channel.

The wallpaper is called, "You Made Pasta"

I posted this wallpaper as

member-exclusive content,

but it seems

that there is―

Ah, the face on this one is way too cute,

so only people in my membership can see it in full.

So umm,

if you're a member, you can see it unedited.

Become a member; see it in full.

Now with regards―

With regards to this thing,

there is―

There is an opinion

regarding this wallpaper, it seems.

Why, it seems that

this wallpaper―

*inhale*

―does not show pasta,

but actually shows penne,

or so they claim.

What do you guys think?

Uhh...

"lol"

"thanks for the plug"

"what ​is pasta"

Uhm...

"penne"

"macaroni"

Umm...

*pasta*

Well, it seems that there are quite a lot

of differing opinions, but

let's see what

Ms. Kiryu C.Co has to say:

"The delicious pasta made by my girlfriend's friend"

Uh―

"The delicious pasta made by my girlfriend's friend"

All of the pasta made by the girlfriend's friend,

all of it, was you who made the pasta.

Don't you agree?

All together now, guys.

Umm, uhh,

I mean, this is―

This is all just pasta.

Your girlfriend, and by girlfriend I mean me,

made a great fantastic pasta wallpaper,

and if you don't think that's great, there'll be trouble.

Don't you all think so?

With that said,

ahh,

wait a sec―

Let me sing this song.

Ahh...

"You Made Pasta"

Uhh...

Brought my GF to play President

You made delicious pasta

That homemade pasta made me fall in love at first sight

Uh―

Your best friend lost and snapped

When you saw that, you made pasta

Your delicious smile heals me

I snapped

That was perfect, yeah?

That's how it goes.

Anyway,

the phrase I want you guys

to learn for today is this one:

"b*tch-made pasta".

It's "b*tch-made pasta".

If we were to say this in Japanese,

it would be:

kanojo ga tsukutta pasta 彼女 が つくった パスタ

This one is fairly easy.

Back in Dragon America,

umm,

"kanojo" is "b*tch", while "kareshi"―

Ah― "kare"― Err...

"kare"― Ergh―

How do you write the "shi"...

"kareshi" (彼氏) is "my man".

Ah―

That's fine.

"my man"

That's what it is.

"kanojo" is "b*tch",

while "kareshi" is "my man".

Then there's

"b*tch-made".

See this one here―

This― Uh―

Attaching "-made" to

a person turns them into the "maker" of the item in question.

It's a simple way to say things.

That sums up "b*tch-made pasta".

Hence,

for example, your girlfriend

took the effort to make a video,

then that's a "b*tch-made video".

Ahh... Err...

And if she made a pizza, then it's

a "bitch-made pizza".

Ah...

You can say it like that, yes.

So if any of you

go to US of Dragon America,

make sure your girlfriend

is aware that she's gonna be called like that.

Why, you ask? Because people will mean to say,

"Oh, I brought my girlfriend," but instead

they say, "Hey, this is my b*tch,"

and when you hear that,

you may think, "Did he just insult her?"

Keep this lesson in mind

so you don't misunderstand it.

Now, for today's weather!

"Sapporo Pota―"

Whoa! That's a hella good drawing!

Damn girl!

Sh-She's...

waiting for that C*lbee sponsorship, huh...

With that said,

thank you all for watching today!

Once again,

have a good morning!

Have a good morning! You worked hard this week! Good job! Just finish up today, and let's watch a movie this weekend!! I'm gonna off some zombies at 7 AM today! Let's have another lively day!!! Your GEBO loved WAIFU, Coco

AAAAAGH!

I―

I forgot the password! The password!

What should it be for today?

I'll go with "bitch".

​

​