Good morning, everyone!
Another morning is upon us!
Good morning, every mf'er in the world!
I am Coco Kiryu!
And this is...
Morning (Asa) Coco Live!
It's Wednesday, which means Asa Coco Live
is airing today!
If you haven't gotten up...
Wake up! Wake up! Wake up! Wake up!
Wake up! Wake up! Wake up! Wake up!
Wake up! Wake up! Wake up! Wake up!
Wake up! Wake up! Wake up! Wake up!
Wake up! Wake up! Wake up! Wake up!
Wake up! Wake up! Wake up! Wake up!
Wake up! Wake up! Wake up! Wake up!
Wake up, okay?
Good morning, guys!
We've got some people making a ruckus today,
so let's take a look.
Watame's here too!
Watame is here, yes!
Let's get started on today's news, then.
What kind of reports do we have today?
Take a look at this!
Hm...
Mmm...
As usual, once we move to this studio,
you see that,
above my head, there is a crowd rattling,
but, regardless, I'll peacefully start our show.
First, a warning that concerns everyone
who comes watch Asa Coco Live.
Maybe not really to everyone,
just to me.
The thing is... we've had a small issue.
I, Kiryu Coco...
Big problem: Asa Coco starts,
Kiryu Coco's voice surpasses audible ranges.
Erm...
When Asa Coco starts, despite how
early it is, I get amped up.
As a result, my voice ends up inaudible...
I want to stay wary of this today.
My voice gets higher and higher and higher and HIGHER
HIGHER THAN A MF'ER. So, y'know.
I want to be careful and not ruin your eardrums.
Gonna keep it deep...
Stay chill and talk calmly...
Not to even mention how,
as was featured
on the last Asa Coco,
"lol sh*t depilation #1 unbearable voice
in the world"
people say I'm "lol sh*t depilation #1 unbearable
voice in the world" and all.
Since it hurts me to hear that
it's physiologically stressful to listen to me,
I want to watch out.
That said, sudden as it may sound,
we regretfully have
sad news to report on, guys.
Extended holiday over,
normal weekdays start today
The extended holiday has ended.
We're back to normal weekdays from today on.
[Primordial Roar]
Urgh, this is... a Japan thing, maybe.
You worldwide viewers wouldn't get it.
Uuuh...
In Japan... In Japan, it was a holiday week.
Four days in a row,
we had holidays.
So there are plenty of people
going back to work today, I believe.
Let's check on the chat above.
Agh, look, there are people screaming!
"sad" "panik" "yametekudastop"
"aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa"
"aaaaaaa"
I see you, I see you...!
Bringing up this topic always
makesthemspawn too.
There were quite a few people
working during the extended holiday.
If you talk about the holiday ending,
they obligatorily show up:
The saddest monster alive
starts to flex about mercilessly working nonstop
"I've been working
for 893 days nonstop"
The saddest monster alive...
Too sad...
They start flexing how they had no holidays...
Spawn of the latestage of wageslave culture...
You know who they are, right?
What a sad culture...
I KEEP WORK
WORK ALWAYS. NO HOLIDAY.
NO BREAKS. NEVER REST.
And so goes on their wailing.
I do Asa Coco Live,
a, y'know,
very national, very idolish
errm, program
and think I have the right to advocate for this.
If you allow me to do so, I want to say
working without ever taking a break,
going 50 days without a single day off is illegal.
If it's illegal,
you should be able to be against it.
To that end, I prepared this.
Abusive companies are no good.
Let's stop bragging about not ever resting!!
The courage to say
bad things are bad
This is what Kiryu Coco proposes:
"Abusive companies are no good. Don't brag about
how long you've gone without a rest."
It isn't legal, so it isn't alright.
Let's reply to those people with
"Ain't that illegal?"
There are some people out there
saying they've gone two years without a day off.
So I think we should
start replying to them in earnest,
that'd be for the better.
If it's illegal, it's not cool.
And speaking of uncool,
it's time for another pathetic report!
This stream here just took place last night.
Fun Yacht @ Lamy's Channel
You guys
must have a gist
of what happened here, I believe.
This stream here,
which happened on Lamy's channel
yesterday.
"Fun Yacht", it reads.
A stream where they play Yacht.
I like Lamy's face here with this unfixed gaze.
I love this face.
She's on a bad trip, and you have no
idea what she's looking at.
This a hololive tradition, good to know the juniors
have properly inherited it, right, Watame?
And, within this stream,
you won't believe it!
'Twas beyond unthinkable!
Ta-dah!
Barely one month since her debut,
yet her second time late due to oversleeping
Ms. Omaru P.
despite having debuted less than a month ago,
overslept for the second time
and was late to the stream!
Unbelievable...
Aaargh!
This is bad!
Oversleeping isn't
good at all!
And, furthermore, despite debuting barely
a month ago, it's the 2nd time already?
Is she not satisfied unless she's late once
every two weeks?
This is, no doubt,
pathetic of her, don't you think?
Well...
Speaking of Ms. Omaru P.,
before her debut,
she distributed
YAGOO macarons, macarons with Yagoo's
smile
imprinted on them
across the office.
She handed them out among the staff,
and, erm...
she gave my manager the only one
The macaron given to my manager
with a crumpled face.
So I already
figured she was gonna be
a suspicious and/or dangerous type.
And she didn't let me down.
We have to admit it...
Erm...
Pathetic.
And also bad, right?
My manager
is spiteful—a spiteful person.
Erm...
She sent it to me as an Asacoco Leak.
"O-Only my macaron...!
Only mine was crumbled...!"
She also said "She smashed the CEO's face...
how dare she...!" or something.
She really wanted me to cover how
she got a crumbly macaron
from the looks of things.
The things she has done are pretty bad,
we gotta admit it.
She broke YAGOO's—the CEO's face.
And despite having only debuted,
she's managed to be tardy twice.
We can only expect
The stern viewers say...
that the stern viewers also...
Let's see what they had to say about it.
Not a single mad dude to be found
"Cute, I forgive you"
"oversleeping again lol"
"asleep again lol"
"great twist"
Huh?
What?
Wut?
Come again?
What's... this...?
Nobody is...?
They're all being nice. "cute, i forgive you.
"oversleeping again, lol"
"again lol" "great twist"
She was instantly forgiven...
When it concerned me...
Like a certain Japanese, erm,
N-Style-ish comedian,
if the tweet said "g'morning", the replies
were "die".
Where did those angry mob dudes go? Huh?
Oh my...
We sure are living in a peaceful age now,
where did they go?
What a kind world...
Everyone's spreading words of kindness now.
Where are they? Where are the angry dudes?
It was amazing, just a few months ago,
before the 5th gen debuted,
my Twitter—
The replies on my tweets—
You know, the reply section
Dumpster of garbage replies
has this thingy here.
Beneath all the replies I got from you guys,
there's this "show more replies" button.
You can see the dumpster of
garbage replies here.
You guys ever see it?
If you scroll down enough,
you see the, erm,
place where the worst words get dumped onto.
If I click this on my tweets,
it's hell.
However,
the 5th Gen's tweets,
regardless of how hard I've looked,
never get this.
There's no "See more tweets" button.
World peace has been achieved,
hololive has been getting...
some love.
If even you viewers can see that, I'm happy.
In regards to this, here's what Expert C said:
Ehm...
Dudes who were mad at everything
have finally fallen into the rabbit hole
The dudes who were always mad at everything
finally fell down the hololive rabbit hole.
Oh well.
They've gone down the hole, probably.
All they say now is "cute lol".
Can't be helped,
we are all "cute lol", after all.
Couldn't end any other way, now, could it?
Alright, onto the next one!
Oh my.
[oh dear]
We seem to have a Freaking Scary report
on our hands.
Just what happened on stream?
Streamed on Suisei Ch.
Hoshimachi Suisei-paisen streamed this
the other day
on her YouTube channel.
She streamed this game called
Dark Deception, a horror game.
It looks to be a scary horror game.
You run around a dungeon
while being chased
and cornered by monkeys.
Some freaking scary occurrences
were said to have happened
during this stream.
Just what on earth
happened while she was playing the game?
Why, it seems that
A strange noise only viewers can hear?!
there was a strange sound
that was only heard
by the viewers!
Guys, this is...
Well, people who saw the stream
should know what happened,
but I clipped that part for those
who haven't seen it,
so let's all take a look.
Let's mute the BGM.
Let's watch the footage.
Back on track.
Collect.
Ahh, break.
[game crash]
Wha―
- What?
- Huh?
The ga―
The game...
crashed.
"That sound is back," they said.
The game crashed.
The game crashed.
It's ringing again and...
the game...
crashed...
Eh?
Okay.
Okay then.
H-How was
my D-D-Dark
D-Deception
p-p-playthrough today...?
Aha. Ahaha. Ahahaha.
The noise― It's still there.
Panic!
Panik!
Isn't this...
Isn't this a bit creepy?
A sudden ringing
"brrrrr" noise in the background.
The game abruptly crashing.
For all these things
to happen while playing a horror game...
Could this be―?!
[fear]
I can feel the bad vibes
surrounding this case!
Panik!
What do you guys think?
"bruh"
"PANIK"
"yamete kudastop"
"PANIK!"
Uhh, uhm, erm―
"EVP??"
"revenge of burritos toile―," burritos?
Who's talkin 'bout burritos?
There are
quite a lot of opinions
regarding what we just saw.
Which is why
I consulted this matter
with a sound engineering expert.
This is what they had to say.
It's electrical noise,
likely from failing audio equipment
According to this sound expert,
the noise is electrical in origin.
It was electrical noise.
They infer this
from all the past statements
Suisei-paisen has made
regarding the deteriorating state
of her audio equipment.
As such, this expert hypothesizes
that the noise is caused by
her audio equipment
approaching the end of its life―
I mean, operational cycle.
Of course, this may not be the only cause.
There may be other problems related
to the rest of her computer setup
We cannot, however, discount the possibility
that it was caused by failing audio equipment.
While it certainly is very probable,
I decided that a sound expert isn't enough for this case.
This is why
I consulted with another expert on this matter.
I asked an expert on
ghosts and paranormal phenomena,
Ms. Cocobert Ripley,
for their input on the matter.
A grudge from the regrets and tears of Anemachi
wanting to show the Captain a 100+ page BL book
"Hmm. This is a pretty freaky occurrence."
"If I were to guess,
"this may have been the work
"of the dregs of Anemachi's lingering regrets
"at how she was unable to
"show this 100+ page
"boys' love anthology
"to Captain Marine
"when they last met."
It could've been a grudge
generated by those regrets.
I remember
that for some reason, Anemachi came up to me
and told me to read this 100+ page
boys' love anthology while crying about
how she wanted to show this book
to the Captain.
Did these feelings of frustration
enter the computer's circuitry, I wonder?
Who knows.
I sure don't.
I will leave the viewers
to draw their own conclusions.
Let's now move on
to today's meme corner!
Today's Meme!
I have a weekly stream
every Sunday at 12 noon JST
where I showcase Reddit memes.
I usually do show them there,
but there are ones that I cut out
due to time constraints, so I
will showcase them here instead!
'kay, today's meme! Ta-da!
[my eyes]
[shock]
Yes, I did!
I did ask for― ask for YAGOO lew―
But I didn't mean it!
Ewww!
See, on my last meme stream―
Memes are these sh*tty hololive image shoops
that the overseas dudes keep churning out.
So anyway,
in that last stream,
I, uhh, well,
I said that posting
our lewds was fine,
and I also remarked that people
should post more YAGOO lewds too.
And someone actually did it,
although they also wrote that, "these are
"the best YAGOO lewds I can come up with :("
[really now]
Why did you take the effort?!
[just why]
"Other lewds"
Other R18 images.
Then this.
"r/Hololive" here refers to
the hololive subreddit.
This is the official hololive board
within Reddit: r/Hololive.
Please keep this in mind.
What this meme is saying is
that the time has come where r/Hololive users
would rather look at YAGOO lewds
instead of other lewds.
Now, hold up.
Nope, not happening!
Stop this right now!
You know I didn't mean it!
"You asked for this. This is your si―"
The overseas dudes are bullying me, saying I deserve this.
"This is your sin."
[my cross to bear]
Okay, I'm sorry.
[crying]
I'm sorry.
I didn't mean it.
I'm sorry. I didn't know you guys were gonna do this.
I didn't that you guys were gonna go so far.
Imsincerelysorryforthispleaseforgiveme!
Let's, umm, look at another meme, then.
How 'bout another one?
Oh?
What's this?
Let's have a closer look.
Erm,
"my mom typing 'H' on my google search"
Huh?!
Their mom
typed in 'H' on their Google search form.
Huh!
"Hololive to the rescue"
In what way?!
It's hololive to the rescue!
hololive is about to save someone, it seems.
To recap,
their mom
typed 'H' on their computer.
But then...
badump!
The search suggestions
might show "hentai" and "hentaiheaven.com"?!
They're screwed!
"My porn browsing history is gonna be exposed,"
is what's on their mind,
however, what appeared instead
was their savior, hololive.
[blessed]
"Hololive streams and meme/youtube"
They stopped hentaiheaven.com...
pushed them aside...
and became the top search
suggestion for the letter 'H'!
Many a dude has been saved by this.
Panik!
Kalm.
hololive
makes you Kalm.
hololive rescues your life!
hololive has,
at this very moment, saved this man's life.
Do you guys have anything to say?
"PANIK"
"PANIK"
hololive definitely saved him.
So,
you can watch hentaiheaven.com anytime!
But,
watch hololive together with it!
If you watch it together with hololive streams,
your mom will never find out
you browse hentaiheaven.com.
hololive has saved another life.
In any case, guys!
Thank you for watching today's new― well, actually,
it's closer to a variety show now, huh―
Anyway, thank you for watching
today's AsaCoco Live!
I'm still figuring out what to
actually do with the show,
so I'm playing it by ear
while getting back my bearings.
It'd be great if y'all keep on watching!
And after this―!
[next slide]
7 AM, after this show! English singing stream!
Ta-ta-da!
Later at 7 AM!
English singing stream coming up in about 30―
40― 40― 40 minutes.
In 40 minutes,
I will hold an English singing stream.
I'm inviting people to listen to this stream
as they commute to work.
My singing's not that good
but I'll be singing anyway,
so don't mind the details
and just listen along!
With that said, thanks for tuning in!
Have a good morning!
The holidays are over! Back to work!
But don't worry! Weekend's only 3 days away!
We can do it! We can make it!
Be thankful that you actually have leaves,
because some people don't!
Enjoy life★as you see fit!
Take a break if you need it!
The fruits of paced labor taste
so much better than forcing yourself to work☆
Living at your pace isn't so bad, huh?